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What if my partner doesn’t want to use condoms?

Many people use the motto: “Safer sex or no sex!” While this is not a bad way to look at using condoms, not everyone welcomes the use of condoms.

In a perfect world, it would be easy to have an honest conversation about safer sex with your partner before you include sexual behaviors in your relationship. Talking about protection before sexual behavior becomes part of your relationship can give you an opportunity to get closer to your partner emotionally and can help the two of you decide whether you’re on the same page when it comes to expectations about sex and protection. Unfortunately, many people find themselves trying to convince a partner to use a condom at the moment when they are feeling turned on, emotionally or physically vulnerable or even drunk.

If you take the time beforehand to have this important conversation, then you can anticipate any potential problems and take steps to avoid situations where it will be hard to get what you need. For example, if you let your partner know that you want to use a condom, and he or she feels defensive about it, then you can take time to let him or her know that you want to use a condom because you care about him or her, your sex life together and the future of your relationship.

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