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Where Do You Stand on Having Sex While Still a High School Student?

By , 15, Staff Writer Originally Published: November 28, 2018 Revised: January 10, 2019

Although the number of teens that are sexually active has dropped in recent years, there is still a range of when teens decide they are ready for sex. For instance, I was born into a Christian home that believes people should not have sex before marriage. I decided that I was going to follow that “rule” and obey not only God, but also my parents. As I got older, I also wanted to save my virginity for someone special. Being realistic with myself about probably not finding “the one” in high school, I decided to remain abstinent. I tend to be a hopeless romantic, so I have no problem waiting because I want things in my relationships and sex life to be a specific way. If this means not having sex as a high school student, that’s fine with me.

These are just my beliefs, however. Every person has their own views on this topic. I was curious to know what other teens think about making the decision to have sex while in high school.

I think sex in high school is OK only if both partners are mature, giving consent and safe

Choosing to Wait

Some teens think it’s best to wait when it comes to sex. “I come from a family that stressed education,” says Paige, 16, of Alden, IA. “I think that teens should focus on their school work because thinking about when it’s right for them to have sex may be a stressor. But I also believe that it’s your choice; this is what I’d tell a friend if she came to me about this.”

Some teens don’t think high schoolers are necessarily mature enough for sex. Declan, 17, of Homestead, FL, explains that when it comes to sex, there can be “that one person who has no care in the world, and then something happens and they regret being reckless.” In Declan’s view, he hasn’t seen teens always be mature when making decisions about sex.

It Depends

Other teens’ opinions on whether or not high school students should be sexually active aren’t as clear-cut. “I don’t really stand on either side when it comes to having sex as a high schooler,” says Angela, 18, of Bylas, AZ. “I feel like there are so many scenarios that I would have to know the situation, and only then could I form my own judgment.” For some teens, like Angela, it’s important to know the situation before forming an opinion.

Mature, Consensual and Safe

Others feel that having sex while in high school is OK. “I don’t think that sex in high school is a bad thing, as long as teens are being careful,” says Conner, 17, of Lindenwold, NJ.

“I think sex in high school is OK only if both partners are mature, giving consent and safe,” agrees Audrey, 16, of Los Angeles. “[I think] if high schoolers can’t do those three things, then they shouldn’t be having sex.”

Liz, 17, of Kujak, MN, also points out the importance of protection to prevent both unplanned pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). “I personally think that having sex whenever you want, at whatever age, is your choice as long as you are double protected and make good decisions,” she says. Liz thinks that there is not just one appropriate time.

We, as teens, have a range of thoughts and feelings about when to have sex. The decision is ultimately up to you!

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